Blind dates.

One of my friends keeps setting me up on blind dates. This sneaky person never takes credit for his or her actions, though--I guess they're trying to keep M from getting mad at them. Although it is wildly flattering that so very many people from the "looking for lost souls" network (the ultimate dating site created for women by women!) are interested in me, I would just like to take this opportunity to let this ever-so-helpful friend of mine know that I am, in fact, very happily married--although one would hope any of my friends had guessed as much about me by now, and therefore I'm not in need of a date or actually, any date-enhancing prescription medicines either, as far as that goes.

In the event that I DID need a date set up for me by someone who refuses to give their name, I would actually not, in fact, be interested in someone with the following interests: juan adulthood sunbonnet flathead cistern fury constituent little auger baggage diagonal bey benefit laureate fenugreek peculiar phosphorus transition circulate bindle dilatory abstruse andy clean rascal tid street detract codicil atheism difluoride choral diffident. I'm much more interested in mensural binding spore whiskey leeway gamut rinderpest, ditchwater puberty bravissimo gnash unaided bokmal centering risky, smegma magistery madcap jaboticaba.

Just so you know.