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Lord of the Rings
Nov. 21st, 2004 09:15 pmI am not the housekeeper I thought I'd be. I wish I had the energy to be touchy about it, but I just don't. It stresses me out when things are out of place and there's hair on the bathroom floor, but yet I don't seem to worry enough to actually do something about it right away. I've been hinting for weeks that I'd like to actually get something done in the evenings/on some day off/over the weekend, but you just never quite heard the followup "I've cleaned like a banshee" post, did you? UNTIL TODAY! M and I have been so productive today that I can't believe we're actually the same lazy people we were yesterday. The house is totally clean (okay, I'm out of Pledge so my dusting was a little sporadic, and I didn't clean the glassware in the bookcase or anything like that--do you think I've gone totally mad?--but it's close enough for horseshoes*), the laundry will be completely done as soon as the sheets are dry, and we watched all three Lord of the Rings movies again this weekend. This was vastly enjoyable but now it feels like a total letdown that we won't get a new installment next month. I also got eight assorted things marked off my to-do list, but I won't bother with the listing. I will add that I'm particularly proud that I closed our old bank account--I finally got around to opening the last two statements yesterday (yes, yes, financially irresponsible but we aren't even using the account so I didn't think of it) and found that they were now charging us $13 a month since our balance dropped below their account limits when we moved all the money to the new bank. That is just the sort of thing that we put off doing for so long that they charge us again, so I'm glad it's done with.
*There's an expression which might or might not be well-known to any native English speaker, and that is "close only counts in horseshoes." (Sometimes the speaker will add "or hand grenades, fyi.) I had to explain that one to M well before we even met in the real world. Imagine how awkward it was on his first visit when I explained that it didn't count if the washer landed on the box if it didn't fall into the hole. The game is one called Texas Horseshoes, and M was quick to point out that I had said many times that close DOES count in horseshoes, after all.. hard to worm my way out of THAT one.
We did, however, fail to have the planned book party. We both have planning to do on our next creative works of genius. Actually, a LOT of planning, in my case. I have an approximately six word summary in head, and one of those words is "a". I'm wondering if that one will even be feasible for me to write at this point, anyway, but I don't have any better ideas, and I kind of like the idea of writing a hybrid romance novel with elements of fantasy and magic woven in, which is what my idea is all about.
Oh, that reminds me. Do we have any LotR experts? I have a few (serious) burning questions. Some of these things are based on what the movies said (and, in a few cases, are about the movies themselves), so if the details are off, maybe that's why I don't understand a few things--it's been a couple of years since I read them.
Edited to add: I think maybe for some reason (?) this came across as if I had only seen the movies. I've read all three of the LotR books and The Hobbit, although not The Silmarillion. Otherwise, I wouldn't have been curious about any but the last Movie Specific questions... Also, I added numbers to the questions instead of just being in a list so they'll be easier to talk about.
*There's an expression which might or might not be well-known to any native English speaker, and that is "close only counts in horseshoes." (Sometimes the speaker will add "or hand grenades, fyi.) I had to explain that one to M well before we even met in the real world. Imagine how awkward it was on his first visit when I explained that it didn't count if the washer landed on the box if it didn't fall into the hole. The game is one called Texas Horseshoes, and M was quick to point out that I had said many times that close DOES count in horseshoes, after all.. hard to worm my way out of THAT one.
We did, however, fail to have the planned book party. We both have planning to do on our next creative works of genius. Actually, a LOT of planning, in my case. I have an approximately six word summary in head, and one of those words is "a". I'm wondering if that one will even be feasible for me to write at this point, anyway, but I don't have any better ideas, and I kind of like the idea of writing a hybrid romance novel with elements of fantasy and magic woven in, which is what my idea is all about.
Oh, that reminds me. Do we have any LotR experts? I have a few (serious) burning questions. Some of these things are based on what the movies said (and, in a few cases, are about the movies themselves), so if the details are off, maybe that's why I don't understand a few things--it's been a couple of years since I read them.
- Where did the Entish women go? That one has really bothered me for a long time. Why did they leave?
- If Gandalf has been around for three hundred lifetimes of men (9,000-21,000 years, being conservative--but didn't Aragorn rule for three hundred years or so? That would be 90,000 years.), why was he not aware of the whole one ring thing? Or, assuming that he was aware but not aware that Bilbo's ring was the big one, why wasn't he in the least bit curious as to what sort of magic ring he had found? How did he not connect the dots since clearly he had been alive during the last big battle, which was only 3,000 years ago.
- Lots of the animals in The Hobbit talked and stuff. What happened in the eighty years or so since Bilbo went off on his adventure to make all the animals stop talking? I'm aware that The Hobbit was originally meant more for children, but still. If the animals talked before, and were aware of what was going on in their world, why were the eagles the only ones to show up?
- Where are the dwarves?
- Okay, so the Elves are off to the Undying Lands, leaving the problems of Middle Earth to the men. Okay, fine. But.. this is a big one. If Sauron is going to destroy the world, and his power extends across the earth, which they mention many, many times... then how exactly will the Elves be safe somewhere else? Wouldn't it just be a matter of time until the battle was on their front doorstep, too?
- If Elrond was there the day that Isildur chose not to cast the ring into the fires of Mt. Doom, why the bloody hell didn't he just take the ring and do it himself, killing Isildur if necessary? (I don't remember if this happened in the books, so if it was a theatrical flourish, disregard the question.) If it is true, though.. how can you try to retain that smug superiority after not making that choice? Isn't it also kind of your fault that mankind is facing this big shebang now?
- Movie Specific: The Two Towers. Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli are scouring the countryside for Merry and Pippin. Aragorn literally has his ear to the ground, Legolas is always sniffing the air for danger. So, why didn't they hear the thousands of Rohirrim--Eomer's bunch..man, he's hot--until they almost ran over them? They jumped behind a rock to avoid being run over, for heaven's sake! This is, we think, the biggest screw-up in all three movies.
- Movie Specific: Why do the characters so often have the wrong reaction to an event? Pippin finds the seeing ball thing. Instead of thanking him profusely for spotting it, Gandalf glares at him and explains nothing. If he'd told him what it was, Pippin probably wouldn't have wanted to take a closer look. When Frodo is distraught because the ring is gone, Sam produces it and Frodo freaks out because Sam had taken the ring. WTF? And why, tell me why, do they give the ring to the one person who is physically impossible of remaining upright for more than ten seconds at a time? (Our Official LotR drinking game goes like this: Take a drink if: Frodo falls down, Frodo offers to give someone the ring, any hobbit says or does something indicating that his sexuality is in question or if Arwen bequeathes her immortality.)
- Movie Specific: Why is Theoden's beard green?
Edited to add: I think maybe for some reason (?) this came across as if I had only seen the movies. I've read all three of the LotR books and The Hobbit, although not The Silmarillion. Otherwise, I wouldn't have been curious about any but the last Movie Specific questions... Also, I added numbers to the questions instead of just being in a list so they'll be easier to talk about.
