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Oh, we had such a cranky baby last night. It didn't even occur to me to post before running to bed to leave M to deal with her! Doesn't that sound awful? M and I have worked out a system on the sleep thing. He stays up with her. If she refuses to sleep (or, as is common, falls asleep and stays asleep for ten minutes before waking up ready to PLAY!) then he will wake me up at two. When she wakes up in the night to eat, he will get her up and change her, and then I'll feed her and then stay up with her as long as it takes. She was just mildly cranky by the time I went to bed. She had been fussy before M got home, and I was more than happy to turn her over to him with a perfectly valid excuse* for doing so in cooking dinner. Anyway, she was irritable but nothing out of the ordinary when I went to bed. M woke me up two hours later to feed her, and that's when I found out that she had been screaming like she has not done since the day we left the hospital and she screamed inconsolably for three hours, culminating in us being released, and her riding out to the car with me in my wheelchair and both of us crying. He had shut the bedroom door, so I hadn't heard any of that. Apparently, her belly had been hurting an awful lot.
Also, I didn't mention it but she recently said her first two words--"a wing." Now, that is not the words that we had expected to hear but it was certainly much sooner than we were expecting her to speak so perhaps it works out? We couldn't quite figure out what a wing might refer to, but according to M, she likes to talk about wings when she is in terrible pain, because she took a few breaks from the screaming to tell him a wing! a wing! during the worst parts of her gas pains. Poor little baby and her wing. I volunteered to stay up with her then but he told me not to tempt him. I'm pretty sure what he was thinking was that I would need at least a few hours of sleep if I was going to stay up with her the rest of the night. Sure enough, I was up at two to take her, but she finally fell asleep and was too exhausted to wake up, so I was back in bed at three after dozing on the couch a bit with her. M said (darkly) this morning when I told him when we came back to bed that she just wanted her mommy. I think he is trying to rationalize me putting her to bed in future... :) Just kidding. Seriously, though, when he took her back after I fed her and told me to go to sleep, I thanked him for staying up with her, and he grumbled at me that it was his job just as much as mine. I love him. I am lucky to have someone who feels that way, judging from how most of the fathers I know (locally) are. [Do I really need to say that I am fully aware that she isn't actually saying "a wing" as her first words? Just checking.]
Umm. I just realized that the fact that the baby has been much crankier than usual in the last half of this week coincides perfectly with that pan of very chocolatey brownies that I made and ate almost by myself. Didn't I just say that caffeine makes her cranky? I won't blame her gassy trouble on it, but the fact that she stopped sleeping very well might be because of that. Oops. This "what did you eat to hurt your baby?" thing sucks ass. It's probably nothing to do with me but of course I can't stop thinking it's my fault, and feeling guilty when someone is asking me what I ate when she's crying. It's like they're asking, "Why did you make your baby cry on purpose, you selfish, selfish bitch?" Do I really need help piling on guilt?
Meanwhile, I have been getting lots of bills for the delivery and the baby's care after birth. I, being responsible, have paid them as is reasonable. I skipped one because they sent an amended one later with an actual insurance adjusted amount rather than the estimate they originally sent. The hospital charged $542 for my stay and $96 for Evelyn's (including the ultrasound of her heart, which was "valued" at over a thousand bucks) In the last week or two, though, I've gotten an additional request for money from my clinic (which I paid) and a $500 bill from the pediatrician's office for the doctor merely showing up at birth and once a day afterward. I think that's pretty unreasonable--looks like the hospital would have charged more if those are reasonable rates--so I started investigating, and asked the obgyn clinic to send me an itemized statement. I had paid them once back in March, after all. Looking at it this morning, it is pretty clear that what happened is that the insurance company has paid them the wrong percentage--80% instead of 90%. I have no idea if that's what's going on with the other bills I've gotten or not but seriously, how come an insurance company can't figure out what percentage they need to pay a provider? Do they not keep records at all? I had the 80% plan last year. This year, I'd really like them to pay 90% since I've been paying for that plan/amount from every paycheck. I don't think that's unreasonable.
Our internet is sucking terribly today. I can only see websites randomly, for a few minutes at a time, every so often. It took me an hour to get to read LJ. I'm so glad that I switched our service back to the cable company. Blah.
*I don't need an excuse to give her to her father, but I try not to make a habit of throwing her at him the second he walks through the door. It is good to be able to breathe for a minute when you first get home from work. It doesn't always work, especially if she's been awake a while and there are no dinner preparations. But I try. It makes me feel better about letting him stay up half the night with her before going to work in the morning.
Also, I didn't mention it but she recently said her first two words--"a wing." Now, that is not the words that we had expected to hear but it was certainly much sooner than we were expecting her to speak so perhaps it works out? We couldn't quite figure out what a wing might refer to, but according to M, she likes to talk about wings when she is in terrible pain, because she took a few breaks from the screaming to tell him a wing! a wing! during the worst parts of her gas pains. Poor little baby and her wing. I volunteered to stay up with her then but he told me not to tempt him. I'm pretty sure what he was thinking was that I would need at least a few hours of sleep if I was going to stay up with her the rest of the night. Sure enough, I was up at two to take her, but she finally fell asleep and was too exhausted to wake up, so I was back in bed at three after dozing on the couch a bit with her. M said (darkly) this morning when I told him when we came back to bed that she just wanted her mommy. I think he is trying to rationalize me putting her to bed in future... :) Just kidding. Seriously, though, when he took her back after I fed her and told me to go to sleep, I thanked him for staying up with her, and he grumbled at me that it was his job just as much as mine. I love him. I am lucky to have someone who feels that way, judging from how most of the fathers I know (locally) are. [Do I really need to say that I am fully aware that she isn't actually saying "a wing" as her first words? Just checking.]
Umm. I just realized that the fact that the baby has been much crankier than usual in the last half of this week coincides perfectly with that pan of very chocolatey brownies that I made and ate almost by myself. Didn't I just say that caffeine makes her cranky? I won't blame her gassy trouble on it, but the fact that she stopped sleeping very well might be because of that. Oops. This "what did you eat to hurt your baby?" thing sucks ass. It's probably nothing to do with me but of course I can't stop thinking it's my fault, and feeling guilty when someone is asking me what I ate when she's crying. It's like they're asking, "Why did you make your baby cry on purpose, you selfish, selfish bitch?" Do I really need help piling on guilt?
Meanwhile, I have been getting lots of bills for the delivery and the baby's care after birth. I, being responsible, have paid them as is reasonable. I skipped one because they sent an amended one later with an actual insurance adjusted amount rather than the estimate they originally sent. The hospital charged $542 for my stay and $96 for Evelyn's (including the ultrasound of her heart, which was "valued" at over a thousand bucks) In the last week or two, though, I've gotten an additional request for money from my clinic (which I paid) and a $500 bill from the pediatrician's office for the doctor merely showing up at birth and once a day afterward. I think that's pretty unreasonable--looks like the hospital would have charged more if those are reasonable rates--so I started investigating, and asked the obgyn clinic to send me an itemized statement. I had paid them once back in March, after all. Looking at it this morning, it is pretty clear that what happened is that the insurance company has paid them the wrong percentage--80% instead of 90%. I have no idea if that's what's going on with the other bills I've gotten or not but seriously, how come an insurance company can't figure out what percentage they need to pay a provider? Do they not keep records at all? I had the 80% plan last year. This year, I'd really like them to pay 90% since I've been paying for that plan/amount from every paycheck. I don't think that's unreasonable.
Our internet is sucking terribly today. I can only see websites randomly, for a few minutes at a time, every so often. It took me an hour to get to read LJ. I'm so glad that I switched our service back to the cable company. Blah.
*I don't need an excuse to give her to her father, but I try not to make a habit of throwing her at him the second he walks through the door. It is good to be able to breathe for a minute when you first get home from work. It doesn't always work, especially if she's been awake a while and there are no dinner preparations. But I try. It makes me feel better about letting him stay up half the night with her before going to work in the morning.
