(no subject)
Jul. 7th, 2005 05:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
same_skyI went to bed before posting last night. I had it halfway written, but I had a horrible headache yesterday and I finally gave in to it at around nine and went to bed. My head has hurt today, too, but not nearly as bad. Today it's just an annoyance if I think of it. I have two things that I must. do. today. or else I'll feel worthless. But I came home and did a workout, so I'm hoping that all that energy they always talk about will appear here in a few minutes. M found this computer game thing that basically emulates a personal trainer, so that's our current project. Floor exercises, basically.. you watch this animated person exercise and follow along. It's really cool, actually, but it doesn't sound much like it right now. Although, I can already tell that I need to arrange a few things if this is going to work. Namely, I have got to wear shoes and proper attire next time. Ouch.
It's just as well that I didn't post yesterday because I was in a horrible mood. I don't know what the deal was, except that it was Wednesday and I hate Wednesdays. I had major motivational problems.. you know, one of those days when you look around you and wonder what the point is. And then I feel massive guilt because I worry about such stupid things when there are plenty of people with real problems all around the world. I have True Love in my life. I've had the fake stuff before and I can tell you that the real kind, that makes up for a whole lot. As long as I have M, everything else is secondary. And honestly, we have a pretty good life right now. We don't have enough time together, and we're too far from my family for my tastes and work takes up a lot of time, but we're putting money in the bank every month and we're healthy and we're just as much in love as ever, even if I don't post about it as much.
Actually, I don't know what happened to my sappy shmoo posts. I still feel it, and sometimes I think to write it, but it feels awkward now. I'm not a good blogger these days because I don't have it in me to be honest anymore. The ones who are really, really good are the ones who are so honest it hurts, honest even when they know that people will disagree and be really mean about it. Dooce (is it not the pinnacle of blogging success when you don't even feel that you need to provide a link anymore?) is one. I think it's because there are real-life people who read this now, whereas before, it was all anonymous internet peoples. Now I have to filter it though "what would I say to someone in real life?" and that has frankly made me suck lately. There's just an awful lot that I don't really want to talk about.
That was entirely too introspective. I get that way when I'm moody, I guess. I think I'll stop now, and go do my homework like a good girl. And, one more day until the weekend. I am so ready.
It's just as well that I didn't post yesterday because I was in a horrible mood. I don't know what the deal was, except that it was Wednesday and I hate Wednesdays. I had major motivational problems.. you know, one of those days when you look around you and wonder what the point is. And then I feel massive guilt because I worry about such stupid things when there are plenty of people with real problems all around the world. I have True Love in my life. I've had the fake stuff before and I can tell you that the real kind, that makes up for a whole lot. As long as I have M, everything else is secondary. And honestly, we have a pretty good life right now. We don't have enough time together, and we're too far from my family for my tastes and work takes up a lot of time, but we're putting money in the bank every month and we're healthy and we're just as much in love as ever, even if I don't post about it as much.
Actually, I don't know what happened to my sappy shmoo posts. I still feel it, and sometimes I think to write it, but it feels awkward now. I'm not a good blogger these days because I don't have it in me to be honest anymore. The ones who are really, really good are the ones who are so honest it hurts, honest even when they know that people will disagree and be really mean about it. Dooce (is it not the pinnacle of blogging success when you don't even feel that you need to provide a link anymore?) is one. I think it's because there are real-life people who read this now, whereas before, it was all anonymous internet peoples. Now I have to filter it though "what would I say to someone in real life?" and that has frankly made me suck lately. There's just an awful lot that I don't really want to talk about.
That was entirely too introspective. I get that way when I'm moody, I guess. I think I'll stop now, and go do my homework like a good girl. And, one more day until the weekend. I am so ready.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-07-07 11:28 pm (UTC)Trust you and M to have an computerised personal trainer :)
no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 01:59 am (UTC)Our personal trainer is named Maya. She is very perky. I'm glad she's not real otherwise I would kill her.